2006-10-30 (月)
- 前会社ネタ

自分の隣の席には罠が仕掛けられている……。

本日、給料日。

毎月末になると事務の人が各机に回ってきて、一人一人に給料袋を手渡してくれます。 結構皆さん給料袋の封を切って明細を確認しているようですが、私から言わせてもらえれば毎月の金額が判りきっている(※1)のになぜ毎回中身を確認するのか理解に苦しみます。 自分は封も切らずにそのまま鞄に放り込んで放置してしまいますが。

(※1)判りきっている……年俸制だから。年収を12等分した金額が月の給料となる。

隣の席にいるエフ主任。隣に来てから早1ヶ月。 そのエフ主任も給料袋の封を切って確認する人の一人。 そしてなぜかそのまま給料袋を机の上に置いてある透明な小箱に入れたまま放置……。 要するに自分の机からふと横に目をやると、エフ主任の給料袋があるのがわかる(小箱が透明だから)のです。

……ちょっとこれはどうだろうか。

こういうことには人一倍注意を払いそうな人だと思っていましたが。 先月はそんなことを少しだけ考え、後は忘れていました。

ところが今日。 今日は隣の席にいるエフ主任が打ち合わせのため午後から不在v( ̄Д ̄)v イエーイ 隣に人がいないとインターネット見放題仕事に集中できます。そして午後に何気なくエフ主任のいない隣の席に目をやると……。

給料袋出しっぱなし。

透明な小箱にすら入っていません。完全に机の上に放置状態。はっきり言ってしまえばエフ氏の給料明細を見ることができる。ほんの20cm手を伸ばしたその先に……。 しかし心の良心が「見ては行けない。それは卑怯者のすることだ」と囁きかけますが、天性の野次馬根性ジャーナリズム精神がっ!!

これは神様からのプレゼントだ!ありがとう神様!!

「さっそく拝見させていただきまーす」狂気乱舞した。しかしふと思い直した。

これって罠なんじゃね?

あの性格がネチネチした(少なくとも私はそう思っている)エフ氏が無防備に給料袋を置いておくはずがない。袋に手を伸ばした瞬間、ネズミ取りがバチンと凶暴な音を立てて捕獲されるのではないだろうか。 いやいやあるいは。袋の中には

見てんじゃねーよ。プギャーm9(※2)。残念ワロスwwwwwwww

(※2)m9……人指し指で人をさしている。

などという紙切れが入っているんじゃないか。 おそらく……一番考えられるのは……。

翌日。 エフ主任「あなた昨日、私が机の上に置いてあった給料袋覗きましたよね」 私「いや………そんなことするはずがないじゃないですか(ドキドキ)」 エフ主任「昨日、この袋にマーキングしておきました。打ち合わせから帰ってきたらそのマーキングがずれていました。と、いうことは誰かが覗いたとしか考えられません。」 私「………………………」 エフ主任「あなた以外に袋を覗く人がいるとは考えられません。だから覗いたのはあなたに間違いありません。」

これぐらいやりかねないから恐ろしい。 やはり。これは罠だよな。

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